Monday, December 15, 2008

Blogspot blows.

After growing more and more frustrated with blogspot (basically just with how big it will let me make my photos) I said to hell with it and purchased the URL So I'm moving on. If you would like to keep up with the life in times of a retard... go to and forget this blogspot crap.
- Gordo

Friday, November 14, 2008

"You Freegen Bum!"

For Halloween Jam and I showed up to the party dresses as bums. It wasn't to hard. All I did was hang a cardboard sign around my neck, carried around a Starbucks cup asking everyone for change, bummed beers off everyone there and collected all the cans from the party.

At one point I looked at Jam and asked him if his disability check from the goverment had come in yet and we just died laughing because I wasn't joking. We really are homeless... and a couple of bums. We both slept in a tent in Rob's backyard that night.
We're really doin it.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Suffer Camp III

Horn and I drove to SD to Suffer with Hitz and Heddings.

And it all started at Hitz's house.

Thats the Thrasher Beer Helmet on the right.

Horn... Splif life.

Straight to the Tilted Stick in OB.

Keg ollie in front of the Stick.

Then straight to the bar stool.

Suffer ditch.

Day 2 of Suffer 3 we started out at Sketch park.

This thing is fun as fuck.

"Dudes... I got this pool..."

Shit was sick.

Hitz called the steps in the shallow "free lunch" so of course when I gave it a few good attempts I almost knocked myself out by slamming my head on the lip. pretty stoked.

Ditch thing.

Horn knows how to really suffer.

See the Suffer Camp III video at:
(its buried in the Creature Blog)

Monday, October 6, 2008

The Rip Rider

I got a new toy in the mail courtesy of Creature. The "Rip Rider" is a new mini cruiser board that comes complete with huge translucent black OJ3 wheels, black bullet trucks (I changed them to Ace trucks) and a pured plastic, pre-griped coffin shaped deck. It's SO fuckin sick!

I've been tearing around the streets of San Francisco on this little thing. Its so fun. My board collection is starting to get out of hand and I might need a bigger apartment to support my addiction of cool little cruiser boards.

I fucking love skateboarding. Just in case you didn't know.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Let me Introduce you... this is Mr. Rosser.

Over the last year or so I've had the chance to get to know and become good friends with Mr. Billy Rosser. Here is his story.

Gordo: Well, Billy Rosser… What inspired you to go to school for wine?
Rosser: To be completely honest, um… Someone told me I could be a drunk, and get paid for it.

Gordo: What is your favorite bottle of wine? Make, Model and year.
Rosser: I really should say something expensive but I’m actually going to say something shitty and cheap.

Gordo: Two buck Chuck?
Rosser: I love their Sauvignon Blanc you got me. Any year, its all Calafornia blended. From start to finish it’s the best wine on the market. Hands down.

Gordo: Charles Shaw?
Rosser: Shaw.

Gordo: Alright… Two buck chuck. Red or white?
Rosser: Red usually. Unless it’s two dollars, and then it’s the Charles Shaw Sauvignon Blanc. Ice cold. Preferably on ice.

Gordo: Wow, on ice?
Rosser: Yeah.

Gordo: What is wine, on ice, with soda water? That has a name right?
Rosser: …Spritzer.

Gordo: Yeah yeah. If you could be sponsored by a Vineyard, who would it be?
Rosser: Ahh fuck… these questions are fuckin curve balls man!

Gordo: We’re talking paychecks, photo incentive… we’re talking product. But you basically need to be how Shawn White is to Target. Fully blow it out. You have to be the poster boy for this Vineyard.
Rosser: AHH, Fuck am I in it for the money or am I in it for the cred?

Gordo: That’s the question you need to ask yourself.
Rosser: Well, if I’m in it for the money I’m goin for the fuckin Ch√Ęteau Rothschild, which is the Ferrari of wine.

Gordo: Shat-toe Roth-Child?
Rosser: Rothchild. I’m butchering it. They have a couple different vineyards. BUT, if I was gonna go the way of my heart I would be skating for Charles Shaw.

Gordo: Fuck it. Skate for Chuck.
Rosser: Charles Shaw is basically the Pabst Blue Ribbon of wine.

Gordo: So is it more like Anit-hero or like Natural Koncepts?
Rosser: It’s way kookier then Anit-hero would ever be, so its more like Natural Koncepts.

Gordo: It’s the Natural Koncepts of wine? Sick. Sick. Um… Fruit or cheese?
Rosser: Cheese…. Fruit just gives me the shits man.

Gordo: Goat, Sheep or Cow?
Rosser: I’m gonna have to go with Goat.

Gordo: Excellent. That is what you’re eating right now. (as I point at a small plate of goat cheese and crackers that I set out on my coffee table for the interview)

Gordo: So my friend Noah (DAF) told me this story, about bums in Santa Cruz that were drinking Gasoline and Milk. One part gasoline to three parts milk. They said the milk coated your stomach so the gas wouldn’t kill you, but you got super fucked up. Do you think that’s possible?
Rosser: Yeah.

Gordo: Would you drink that?
Rosser: Yeah. Probably.

Gordo: Have you ever heard of a Chicken Milk Bomb? Do you have any idea what it is?
Rosser: Chicken Milk Bomb?

Gordo: Or a Roach Bomb?
Rosser: No. Chicken? What would a Chicken be? Do you shit in a beer and give it to someone?

Gordo: No. You take a two-litter bottle, you shove pieces of chicken into it and then pour about two cups of milk in, then cap it, then you hide it.
Rosser: Oh god!

Gordo: As the meat rots and the milk goes bad it fills the bottle with gas that will make it pop. It happens over a long period of time.
Rosser: It blows the cap off?

Gordo: No. Well… maybe. See you hide it. Lets say your landlord fucked you over and you needed to move out because of some lame crap? You could make one and hide it in an air vent or inside the drywall. They’ll end up ripping down every wall in the house before they find out were the smell is coming from.
Rosser: Man, this is some Maryland call out shit, but when I worked at Giant (foods), we would knock open ceiling tiles and throw whole raw chickens into the ceiling, and take the broom and knock it back over.

Gordo: Did you work at night or during the day?
Rosser: During the day.

Gordo: You would do that during the day?
Rosser: Well… around 9pm when no one was around. We would come up with tons of shit because we were so bored. We would hide banana peels around the store and check on them from time to time for development.

Gordo: Who just texted you?
Rosser: Some chick.

Gordo: Does she know she’s part of the interview now?
Rosser: She does. (laughing)

Gordo: Text her right now “how many stairs have you ollied?” That’s your next question.
Rosser: I believe the answer will be one. Me, 5. When I was a kid huck. I mean, my shit is I skate ledges man. But here you’re a kid you don’t know the difference. Saving your body. I would say the most I ever hucked myself off of was the Glen Burnie 11.

Gordo: WOW! Glen Burnie High! Callin it out!
Rosser: I don’t think I ever landed it. I blame Glen Burnie High School for every problem I have, Physically.

Gordo: Which you should. Do you think Bobby is ever going to ollie Canadian Embassy?
Rosser: Yeah

Gordo: If Bobby didn’t, who do you think will be the next to attempt it?
Rosser: (still I don’t want to impede on some secret shit, but Zach Lyons really tries to keep this a secret, but in his “Behind the Griptape” he uses footage of someone else ollieing it, but I saw him ollie Canadian Embassy. He is one of the gnarliest people I have ever seen ride a skateboard. He tries to pull this art-fag bullshit but I know that dude is gnarly.

Gordo: So Bobby should just give it up?
Rosser: Actually! Zach ollied it because Cameron, future Zach, ollied it first.

Gordo: Future Zach?
Rosser: Yeah. Cameron. Zach’s older brother. (still texting some chick on his cell phone).

Gordo: Could you walk us through a perfect day with Billy Rosser?
Rosser: wake up, vomit, drink two beers, eat a burrito, vomit, drink two more beers, it’s probably about 7 or 8 at night…

Gordo: Is that when you wake up?
Rosser: No I probably woke up around 6(pm). So Wake up, vomit, drink, eat, vomit… perfect day, it’s a Sunday, you’re working at Pops. Perfect day, I go to Pops, I puke at 3, I’m out from 8pm to 3 in the morning. Perfect day. I’d fall asleep vomiting in Danny’s bed and not feel any regret.

Gordo: So you’ve been living the perfect day for the last three weeks. Any final words?
Rosser: Can I get another beer?

So there he is. Now you have met... Mr. Rosser. What can I say... dude likes wine.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Obsessed with collecting Neil Albums

In tribute to my latest obsession, here is a collage of album covers edited to one of my favorite songs. And yes... I still don't smoke weed... and I fuckin love Neil Young.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Justin Schlegel interview coming soon...

...but for now watch this clip that Bagel made about a year back. This shit cracks me up ever time I watch it. I freakin love that dude.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Surfs up on the SF hills (bro)

Shit was gettin weird in the hills of San Francisco the other day.

Strubs! How does my ass look in this suit bro?

High fives were comin out of everywhere.

Bomb a hill on that thing!

Toad (Bodhi) was at full hang loose status.

Strubs (Johnny Utah) was just waitin for the tide to break all day.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Field Agent Puddin: Baltimore update

Puddin comes through yet again with excellent work. Big guy, might turn out to be a real photo journalist just yet. Here we have...

Lindseys brothers girlfriend after eye surgery.
aka. crazy eyes.


Anther great hand crafted Baltimore treasure. How long to you think Al & Donna worked on this before deciding it was worded perfectly?

PS. I just got a text message from Rory The Rattler that reads:
"just purchased 120 bud lites"

Thursday, September 4, 2008

On the Road with the Creature Ams

I was on the road with all of the Creature AMs for almost 2 weeks. It was a month and a half long trip that I got to spend two weeks on. I flew into Denver and flew out of Portland. Heres a few photos from the trip.

Loaded up.

This was in Denver. The head honcho over at the Vortex Union (CO chapter) lined up the ramp session. Thanks again big V!

South Park corner store.

Just outside of South Park, CO is this park. I think its the highest elevated skatepark in the nation at somewhere around 9000 feet. It's hard as hell to breathe up there.

The roads between Denver and Portland look pretty much like this...

...and this.

We stopped to look at the snake river at the point where Evil Knievel tried to jump it. Dude was the gnarliest.

Pro filmer dude-guy Garrett Hunt was stoked on this Snake River bridge.

Twin Falls, Idaho. An early morning warm-up skate session turned into a full on Creature demo. All it took was a few phone calls from the locals and the whole town was there in minutes asking for free product and autographs. Shit got kinda gnarly so we broke out pretty soon after that to finish off our drive to Portland.

Imagine the NHS van following Knuckle in his new midlife-crisis-mobile. It was pretty dam funny.

Mumma, Vince (black label tag alongs) and Marky... not being very covert about their weed consumption (hourly).

Knuckle, driving the 00knuckle-mobile.

My last night on the trip we camped out on the beach in Lincoln City, OR. After I woke up it was off to the Portland airport to fly back to SF.

Recap: The trip was fun as hell!

Friday, August 22, 2008

Field Agent Puddin: On Baltimore Styles

Puddin sent me a few photos keeping me updated on what is going on in Charm City. This first photo is of and classic Baltimore hair-style gone... wrong? Or maybe dude asked for this cut? Not really sure. Just another hair cut that is keeping Baltimore trashy.

Then... this lady.

Passed out on a Baltimore city bench, her cane about to fall, front-butt folding over her lap, and an empty beer under her right hand. It was obviously a nice day to get drunk on the street. No problem for this lady... she looks like she's pro at being a pile daily.

Good work Puddin! We can't wait to see more.